it’s 4 am, well almost, now here at my place and i am still up rushing through my readings since i actually have a tute this week that requires us to be totally intelligent on the topic for this week. even though it is the first week of school and nevermind the fact that some of us might actually have a life outside of university.

reading through the topics laid out though, it brings to mind a sad reality- how humans can be so cruel to each other.

genocide studies can make a bitter person out of humans 😮

at the moment i am stuck at the ottoman empire’s massacre of the armenians, and then the jewish holocaust of the 2nd world war. armenians, jewish, europeans as a whole, american indians, chinese, aboriginals, caucasians. really, look at this segregation of the human kind. isn’t it blood that flow through us? we all take a piss at some point in time of the day at least once, take a shit at least once a day and we all have our personal worries, problems, happiness, laughter, sadness and, eventually, death. what makes one race different from another?

better yet, why is there even a word called race?

just because we look different from one another? practise a totally different faith/culture/language? circumstances made all of us different. some people believe in God, some don’t. i believe in him and that we are all made the same yet different so that we all can make this life beautiful with our individuality.

i mean fark, i dont wana look like, behave like, smell like, talk like and walk like the bimbo next door. what monstrosity could it be that could compell a man to send his neighbour to death, because of his race? are we not all the same? yet different because we could be different?

all the questions but many an answer. the mind of man is a complex thing. there are many things that can break it, and this we call insanity. and there are many things that can set it straight, in which we call it rationality. what lies between is possibly the heart of humanity, or does it exist in the world of today?

look around you, who is thinking what? what are you thinking today? we all joke at the expense of someone. perhaps it maybe their looks, their figure, the way they talk, the way they walk, or even just the way they touch the things around them. in our minds, we set these people apart, for their little differences from us. it can be anything from as small as the little ring that they may have worn just to look “cool” but look retarded to us, or to something as big as their skin color. could this be what can spark off a possible segregation between what is “us” and what is “them”?

the fear that lies beneath each judgement. fear, you might say, isn’t really that, it’s really more about hatred for a certain part of this person, this race, this group of people. but i say, from fear stems hatred. i don’t know much about these people, they seem to be able to do things that i can’t, i am scared of them, i hate them. that often seems to be the endless ranting that goes through everyone’s head, to which they would hate to admit, for that is to say that they are weak and just like everyone around them.

is it so hard to live with one another? sure the arguments makes life interesting, but to have entertainment at the expense of thousands of lives, that might not be a very good idea.

God said in the bible, Do unto other as you would them do unto you.

can you imagine if there is a time machine of some warped sort, that goes back in time and talks to, say, Hitler, and showed him the monstrosity and the impact of his deeds, what would he have said? and then warped the time around such that, instead of the deeds done unto the jews, but its from the jews to the germans, how would he have felt as a human being?

Anyone can be a totalitarian, anyone can commit all these “crimes” to another person, it is NOT about being a jew or a german, armenian or a turk, but really about, hey, would u do that to this other person, without feeling a thing? and if so, if it’s done unto you, as a victim, would u feel anything? then why would you perform such an act, to hurt someone, or many people that you do not know, nor have met?

i wonder, for today, can it be possible for people to be nice to the person next to you? it’s not just about saying hi, or giving a smile, although a smile is a good start for you never know when u have lit up someone’s day…

but rather, would u help someone u have never known, never met, talk to that someone and find out more about them?

some time ago, i sat down next to an old man and just randomly started talking. just asking about his day, how he was. although i was kind of made to do this, i have to WANT to perform this act to get through this part of my course back then. but you know, just randomly talking, it lit up his day, and the lady next to him, and then the lady who was talking with her. soon i had 3 old people just sitting there, talking about their children, talking about life, all over cups of coffee.. and they were happy, if only just for that moment, if only just for that day.

would you walk out today with an intent to light up someone’s day? it’s not just about yourself here.. this world is full of people, this world is one giant community. someone out there needs some loving, would you be the one to hand some to him?

^.^ good night

another random rambling by panda~

hi~~ welcome to the entirely deleted blog of mine 😛

in my illness and craziness i decided to restart this blog more coz i have decided the past should stay the past. letting people know my experiences and so on isnt going to change anything, theirs, mine, anyone’s really. i mean i am still going to blog, and also blog about what’s happening here. but going on about my past isnt guna make it better or change who i am now. using it to remember something is ok but yer..


some stuff shud just stay back where they are coz it doesnt really affect the future, it is the person who is living at the moment who affects it anyways ^.^

for all my friends out there. the same words apply 😛 i am sorry i haven’t blogged for so long, it isnt very natural to me yet to be posting stuff that goes on in my life to be online, on a pc and etc etc. i am guna try and post more this year since i know i have lost touch with most of u. my bad really and i am sorry, nothing is really a good excuse or justification of my abandoning of you guys, and i know u guys are the best.

this blog is dedicated to my friends really and i have failed so badly in upkeeping it so i am guna do it this year around and make full use of it. but first up i need to really really learn html.. i have so many pictures and so on i need to show u guys and digital world have helped that so much but i have grown useless atm with them.

oh btw i am sick did i mention that? thus the huge words coz i think atm its quite funky 😛 just going mad atm, throat is sssooo sore..

when i come back from uni in a while, i shall talk abit more, and try to be less of an airhead and write in this font.

for those whom i have not actually seen online in a while, where have you been? *hint hint* incidentally i have moved out of campus and thus have more access to the net than before, since i dont have to worry about internet data anymore. that was annoying. i have new accounts for emails as well. while i still love being pigshitz (^.^) that has lotsa spams and stuff for my various activities (no that does not mean i have porn subscriptions) and i realised lotsa emails get messed up and go to spam mail which i rarely check coz i thought msn is smart. my bad 😮

so for those who have my uni email account, hey it’s still working if u need me. for those who dont, u can try anivyl@gmail.com.

this concludes my random announcement for today. ^.^ bye bye~